Lesbian Dating

I am humble to be in and ever so grateful for the relationship I am blessed with. Of course the main reason for this is that I love my wife in a different way than I have ever loved romantically before. I love her with a deep and honest understanding of who she is, not just “in spite” of her faults but because of ALL that she is, all her talents and good parts and also all of her not so perfect sides. My love for her generates from a place so true and deep within my soul that no one has ever been close to touching it before. She is the one for me and I will never be able to express how its feels to have been lucky enough to find that in my life.

HOWEVER – that isn’t the only reason I am grateful that we are an item 😉 – that means, too, that I am taken, off the market, unavailable, not interested and therefore NO MORE DATING! Oh, thank the good Lord and the lucky stars for that! What makes LESBIAN DATING so “special” (and especially gruesome) you might wonder?

lesbians on a date

Well. If you are NOT a lesbian yourself you will have precious little knowledge about the subject and I bet that you live with a hell of a lot of misconceptions 😉 you may think something like: what can be more perfect that a Girl-Girl-date where in some weird transcendental way SHE GETS YOU because yeah, she is a woman, too; she will be romantic (because all women are….. are they?!), a master of seduction, and when finally there is SEX, it will be like the 4th of July fireworks in your 4th of Julypants and the peace of Xmas in your heart. THAT is your idea of two women dating? Well. Naaaaahhhhh. Not so much 😉 Reality is SO UNBELIEVABLY DIFFERENT! There aren’t many dates where so much can go wrong as it usually does on a lesbian date! Why?

Scenarios Of Lesbian Dating

  • Lesbians overshare. There is no easy way to say this – we just do. For the love of getting to second base maybe we should stop telling our dates about our exes – and in some weird, twisted way use our Ex as a sort of anti-metaphor for all the things we want in a relationship. Why can’t we just put on our big girl panties and tell her how we feel and what we want without dragging our past relationship into the date? She is your date, for crying out loud. She isn’t your therapist or your bartender so please check your emotional crap at the door!
  • One of the most recognizable problems in the lesbian dating world is the “accidentally-going-on-a-date-with-your-twin” thing that happens with a lot of lesbian women who meet online or are set up for blind dates. It’s not uncommon for the women to both show up in the same flannel, fedora, and even haircut which can be awkward at best and a huge turn-off at the very worst
  • Gaydar. All lesbians think they have it. What is gaydar exactly? Lesbians are supposed to have an inbuilt radar of being able to tell which woman is gay or potentially so and which woman isn’t. That should make dating easier but in fact it makes it even more complicated because honestly? Gaydar sucks! Because a lesbian feels she has gaydar she won’t just get up and ASK a woman that she is interested in. We are TOO sure of ourselves and thus blow a lot of chances. Or maybe we are just too scared to ask because we may get a “no”. Either way, Gaydar should be banned from the vocabulary!
  • Lesbians look for their soulmate. Problem is they look so hard and want to find it so bad that every woman whose tongue has been in our mouths is, of course, IT. Like that, lesbians set themselves up for many disappointments in the course of their dating lives.
  • Who pays the bill??? You are on a date, the guy pays. Its as simple as that. But what if both people on the date are women? If you pay, she may feel as if you are assuming control; if you let her pay, she may feel you are cheap. If you suggest going Dutch she may think that you think of her moneymore as a buddy than a date. No easy solution to that one 😉 but I would always suggest: if you asked for the date you pay. Period.
  • PMS. If you are really really unlucky, both of the girls on the date are PMS. Thats a horror movie come true, people.
  • Its usually not very hard to tell what a guy wants ;-). You may think girls are less prone to wanting to have sex on the first date but you would be wrong again in that assumption 😉 women like sex. Women like sex with other women. So yeah, pretty sure that’s on a girl’s mind!

Regardless of how complicated it may be – keep in mind that love is love and doesn’t care for gender. So, good luck to y’all out there in the dating world, gay or straight or anything in between!

If you have any questions or comments please feel free to leave them below or shoot me a PM at deb@vitalisvitae.com